“How to Get Out Your Own Way”: Inspiration from Tyrese Gibson

I acknowledge that I am a work in progress and accordingly, I am always changing. Change is a part of life, that is, if you are actively growing. I just hope that in the process of all my changes, I am trading up for the better version of myself. Tonight, I realized that I have been holding myself back from many opportunities in life. The inspiration to evaluate how much I’ve really been holding myself back came from reading, Tyrese Gibson’s first book, “How to Get Out Your Own Way”.  I recommend this book to anyone who is struggling to find his or her place in life. I thought it was an excellent read and it really prompted me to think about life and the road to individual success.

Two chapters spoke volumes to my soul, Chapter 1 “Child-Hood” and Chapter 4“Who Are Your Five People?” The first chapter Child-Hood discusses how the people we have become as adults are a direct result of our childhood experiences. We re-create our childhood in our current lives. Chapter 4 talks about how the five people who you spend the most time with will be a good prediction of how far you go in life. (Great advice from Will Smith)

Reading this book has made me think about the thing I struggle with the most in life, and that is picking a circle of friends that will keep me motivated and on point with my goals. Every since I was a child, I always picked the wrong people to spend my time with. While I think I currently have excellent friends, I have failed to add other “people” to my circle because I was thinking that my friends could offer me all the support that I needed. All of my friends have their places and it’s actually unfair to think that they could fill voids that they are clearly not capable of filling. You have to accept your friends for whom and what they are and that means accepting them for what they are not. Great example of this philosophy is that my best friend hates to read. I’ve accepted that I will never be able to have a stimulating conversation over coffee about my last read with her. Although, I would love to share this experience with my bff, I realize that she is not the one. Therefore, I’ve accepted this fact and I find others equally interested in books as I am.

However, I admit, I’m a person that needs constant motivation. This means for me that I need a circle of people around me that will keep me motivated and on track in life. I mean can you really grow as Christian with an entire group of atheist friends? I think once we as individuals realize that we are what we focus on and who we spend our time with, maybe then we can make better choices in those areas of our lives. My epiphany came today with the reading of Tyrese’s book.  There will never be a perfect friend therefore; we must seek out people who will keep us motivated in certain areas in our lives. If you want to be fit and healthy, make sure you have a fit and healthy friend to support you. If you want to stay strong in your faith, ensure that you have friends that can/try to do the same.

I’m in training mode. The way an athlete has to train his body, I am actively training my mind, spirit, body, and soul. This is why I read various books because I’m training my mind, to be strong and focused. I’ve been holding myself back by not expanding my circle.  It’s time to expand and actively seek out people who share my common interest and those that can lead me on the road that I am trying to travel. This has been my biggest flaw throughout life, not going out there and meeting more people who truly “think big”. I guess I am currently fed up with all the small-minded individuals that are in my circle. While I’m not saying that I want to eliminate anyone from it, I am saying that I need to add more to the circle. Allocate my time with different people and see new things. Therefore, I can’t blame it on my friends, if I’m not doing any better; I have to blame it on myself. I have not actively sought the resources of the people that can “add” more to my life.

It’s time for a change. It’s time for me to get out of my own way, and really dedicate myself to the success that I seek. Thanks Tyrese Gibson for the inspiration.

Just A Thought……

The Buppie Foodie

Ash Renee, Founder and Editor in Chief of The Buppie Foodie, is a practicing real estate attorney & broker in NYC. Ash loves exploring the NYC restaurant and social scene. When Ash is not practicing law or writing on her blog, she can be found immersed in a good book

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